You’re mean at times,
You’re so mean that it makes me wish I didn’t exist.
Your anger slaps me many more times than your hands ever have.
And when you’re angry,
You aren’t cooperative at all,
You’re insensitive, stubborn, ruthless and a pain in the ass.
This side of you makes me want to kill you.
It makes me want to kill myself.
It scares me so much that I spend the nights crying instead of sleeping.
I spend the days telling myself how much I hate you,
How much I want you out of my life,
How much I want you to die.
If I could tell you,
I would like to let you know that I honestly hate thinking in this manner.
I hate to think of wanting to hurt my first superhero.
And I know for a fact that you don’t intend to hurt me,
And that it is only your extreme worries and fears that make you act this way.
Please stop being so unreasonable and inconsiderate.
If could tell you,
I’d like you to know that you are actually the ideal man- a responsible son, a doting husband and a lovable father.
You’re a hard working and sincere man.
Please stop being so egoistic.
Please stop letting the devil in you get the better of you.
Please change your ways,
Because deep- down, inside you heart,
You are a loving, a caring and a supportive man.
Please give me a chance to love you,
I want to feel comfortable with you,
And safe when I’m around you;
Like I did when you carried me for the first time and I held your index finger and felt so secure that I stopped crying and slept for hours in the warmth of your arms.
I hate hating you so much.